Summer Bunny

I thought me and my body were one, but after this weekend, i now know that it aint true! yea i'm home for the holidays so trying to get a bit of work experience done so thats monday to friday 8-5 and then here comes the weekend and as i am a summer bunnie.. it would be a waste not to indulge in the bunny tradition of Partying like a nonsense... hitting all the spots as if like cinderellas escorts and rides they will all dwindle away when the sun comes up...its great I've been out every friday and saturday but looking back it all seems the same... so now my body is talking back and it aint whispering...its actually shouting 'Stop All this madness!' so i'm in bed sick and i jus dont want to move but as the weekend draws near...the plans 4 friday r starting to pop and they aint looking too bad...

home sweet home?

So I’ve been back home for a month or so( I’m in uni in England) and the saying therez no place like home doesn’t even come close to how I feel about Nairobi..anyhows I came home for the 2nd time this year and for the first time in my life felt like I should have jus hopped back in that plane and gone back to England...things jus were not the same anymore...I know distance does a lot of things but therez this one person who I thot would always be on the same page as me.. but now I slowly feel like I’m loosing them and with that… my life jus feels topsy turvy...it all started when they 4got my birthday.. I know things slip peoples minds and the fact that I wasn’t around may have also had something to do with it.. but I figured when I got back into the country I figured somehow they would remember but it didnt even come up. Anyway putting that aside, things jus dint seem to click, they seemed to be caught up in a life that quite obviously dint involve me . I’m extremely picky about my friends... I can’t tell you what exactly I’m picky about but I know my pals are one of a kind... they are hella smart, Beautiful and r usually up for almost anything and that’s why my last years of high school were really special. even though i think I was at that point in my life where I jus couldn’t be bothered to make an effort to get to know any new people in my life. Unfortunately my pals were not coming home this summer and when the pal who was at home called me up I was always happy to hook up but I always felt disappointed after we hung out… I felt completely out of the picture… the connection felt so one sided… the icing of the cake came one evening when we were supposed to go home together because I dint want to drive home alone. Them coming with me was the only reason I was going out that night and then they jus up and left with no warning which wouldn’t be so bad if they dint have my car keys and the only person at the club who I kind of knew was The “EX” .. U know the one who u really don’t want to have to need..yup him!.. so there I was feeling totally helpless and the person who I thought I could count on was probably enjoying themselves elsewhere and the last person i would want call in a jam was now the only person who could help me out...luckily that night the ex was feeling especially sympathetic.. so I got through it… the next day all I got from my pal was a sorry excuse for a text...saying sorry... dint even bother to explain themselves or find out what happened to me...so now we aint talking and I feel awful I want to ring them up but shouldn’t they be the one to step up...Am I being petty? I want my pal back but I don’t want to be a doormat.... another of my pals is coming to town for the weekend and she wants to see both of us she has no clue whatsup I said I’d go but I don’t know how I’m going to react when we get together…..

gosh this is new!

hey this is all new to me.. i think i'v got so much in me and i think in order to truelly find myself i've ot to let it out.. who am i is something that really drives me crazy even though i dont think about it too much.. i try and put on this front and when you look at me everything looks fine but do people really see through this and am i only fooling myself..maybe by puting this out there i can find the inner me and hopefully be able to grow